Feelings vs. Fact | Are We Spreading It On Too Thick? | The Mister Brown Show

I have one thought for you today, and that is, “Are we spreading it on too thick?” Are we allowing our experiences to dictate the truth for everyone else? This question applies to racism, virtual signaling, covid, and the pandemic. Are we using a broad brush to spread our experiences over our nation, a certain group of people, a country, a political party, etc… It is best described in the quote, “You are entitled to your own feelings, but not your own facts.” You are entitled to your own feelings but not your own truth; because there is only one truth and the facts are the facts.

One Thought 

First off, I want to thank all of you for the feedback.  I really appreciate hearing what you think about the podcasts, so please keep it up! 

I think a lot when I am doing things that prevent me from actually writing down my thoughts, such as driving, showering, or sitting in the hot tub.  Sometimes those thoughts never get written down, sometimes I have the same thought twice and realize I already wrote it down, and other times things end up not being “fresh.”  This thought came to me this morning when I was in the kitchen.  My daughter Sophia was making herself a bagel and she was spreading the cream cheese on really thick! I was wondering to myself, “Are you going to spread that out?!”  I told her, “that is too thick!”  This interaction made me start thinking about our experiences.  
My wife was telling me about her friend, a nurse, who is struggling because their hospital is overwhelmed and understaffed. She is concerned about her patients’ health as she is responsible for more patients than normal and she is spread very thin. Her experience is a valid experience. I also talked to another nurse who was having a different experience. He lives in the same state, but a different city. He said at their hospital they have had to lay off nurses, the hospital is empty, and that they were no longer doing elective surgeries. He also stated their hospital admitted their covid tests are only 60% accurate. I talked to yet another nurse who said she sees racism in the hospital she works at. She said some people will come in and not want a white nurse to treat them. She said the racism goes both ways and they also have people who do not want a black nurse to treat them. The question is, “Do we take one racist experience and spread it across all hospitals in the nation?” If one black person doesn’t want to be treated by a white nurse or doctor, does that mean all black people are racists? Do we spread that experience across all black people? If one white person doesn’t want to be treated by a black nurse or doctor, does that mean all white people are racists? Do we spread that across all white people?

A friend of mine who passed away, his name was Poe, had told me that his mom hated black people.  He said when she first came to America she was robbed by a black man, so she didn’t trust black people.  Do we take a wide brush stroke and spread it on too thick by saying everybody else’s reality should be based on our experiences?  Sometimes, because of our personal experiences, we are unwilling to listen to other people.  

“You are entitled to your own feelings, but not your own facts.”  

My follow-up question becomes, “Are we allowing our experience to dictate the truth for everyone else?”  This question is answered in the following quote:  

“You are entitled to your own feelings, but not your own facts.”  

You are entitled to your own experiences, but not your own facts. The facts are the facts. You could also say that you are entitled to your own experiences, but not the truth.  The truth is the truth.   

I was talking to a student once who said she thought her mom loved drugs more than she loved her.  I told her the fact is her mother is struggling with addiction, and she knew that. I told her, “but what you don’t see, is maybe she is trying her hardest to get off drugs. Maybe she is crying herself to sleep because she can’t be there for you.”  I had to help her separate what she knew to be fact, from what she didn’t truly know to be fact. 

As we deal with so many issues in our world, racism, covid, the pandemic, our response to the pandemic, all of those experiences matter.  How we look at our experiences matter. We have to start listening to others’ experiences and look for the facts instead of using a wide brush to spread our experiences over everyone else’s reality.

Looking At The Facts

Is there racism in the world? Yes. People hate people because of their skin, and it is sad!

But, do all of one people hate another people group? No! People are individual people. I believe a lot of the stuff that goes on is more about the color of money. The color of power.  It focuses on the question, “Will I discount this group of people for the sake of money and power?”  

What about virtual signaling?  Recently, there was a college that wanted a paper written to honor a professor.  One professor wrote the paper, but the school didn’t want to submit it because they felt it was too racist.  Yet, the same school is no longer admitting Asians because they are Asian.  They are discriminating against Asians because their school has too many Asians enrolled at their school to be considered diverse.  Students’ grades and transcripts do not even matter.  

As I am recording this, there is currently a lot in the news about the January 6 insurrection. Some people are comparing January 6 to Pearl Harbor and 9/11. Now, I am not saying that January 6 was good. However, the same people who made that reference were the ones who said that rioting needed to continue last summer when cities across the nation were burning down. Some people still cannot buy groceries because those places were burned down.  Several police stations were burned. But, it was not until these riots were brought to the politicians, to their ‘turf’ that “oh now these actions are a big deal.”  It is so sad. You can research for yourself what Kamala Harris and Maxine Waters said about the Capitol Riots.  In my opinion, January 6 was criticized so badly because it was brought to the politicians.  They are saying that was bad, but the summer of burning down cities, rioting, and looting was okay and even necessary? 

People Are Individual People

I want us to have a better dialogue about our experiences.  Not simply to look at it from my vantage point, but because people have different experiences. Just because you see it one way, doesn’t mean everyone else experiences it the same.  Just because you are black doesn’t mean all black people experience life the same way. Every black person doesn’t experience life the same way. Let’s look at the facts instead of saying “I experienced this, so everybody else must also be experiencing this” There is no one black culture. I don’t think there is one white culture either.  I think a lot of ‘culture’ is based on where you grew up, your geography. Just because I am black doesn’t mean that people in Africa and Haiti experience life the same way as me.  

We are people. Individual people who are shaped by how we were raised. Are there commonalities? Yes, but we are spreading it on too thick! When I meet a white person I don’t just say “That person is responsible for the fact that my great-grandfather was hanged by white men, so he’s responsible.” No! I don’t know anything about that person! Do I assume every white person has privilege because of the color of their skin? No. Do I assume that a white person who has a job and a lot of money is that way because of their background? No.  If you assume that, that’s on you; but, I can’t assume that. I have seen a variety of people from different races who are rich, poor, really wealthy, have disabilities, etc…Even the fact that I am in what people call an “interracial marriage.”  I didn’t marry a white person, I married Andrea.  Andrea happens to be white. I don’t broad brush. She is an individual person, who I love and I married. People will ask me what I do when people look at us funny. Honestly, I don't know why people look at me funny. They may recognize me from speaking, they may think I’m dressed funny, or something else. But, I am not going to broad-brush you and say that you are looking at me because _________.

This Little Light Of Mine 

Listen, I get that people can be evil. I have personally seen and experienced evil people.  However, I refuse to let those experiences change who God is making me to be. I refuse to let the darkness of this world dim the light that God had placed in my heart and in who I am. The truth is, there is evil in all of us. I am going to let the Christ in me shine to the world. It is like the song “this little light of mine.” I believe God made me for a purpose. To glorify him and to bring light into this world. If you want to call me naive for looking for the best in people or doing the best I can for others, then call me naive. Now, that doesn’t mean I walk around the city with my head in the clouds either. I have my guard up because there is evil in this world. If I am walking down the street and see three men walking towards me, I am going to be aware of my surroundings. That doesn't mean I am racist, it means I am human. Bad stuff happens.  Maybe some of that is because of my mom!  Growing up my mom was always like “lock your doors,” “people are crazy,” “you be careful out there,” and “people steal things everywhere.”  But, I am not going to let that evil dim the light in me.  It is all a choice; and like I always talk about, when you make better choices you will live a better life.  So choose well. Oh yeah! 

I would love to hear your feedback and for you to engage in the conversation. What do you think? Are we spreading it on too thick? Are we allowing our experiences to dictate the truth for everyone else?  

I would appreciate it if you share this with friends or family and leave a rating for the podcast!  As always, you can check out https://www.hellomisterbrown.com/